After I wrote this post last week, I found out Emma was accepted into the summer program through DDD!  It was wonderful news and I was SO relieved to hear it!  Immediately I went through the directory scouting out options for Emma.  There were only 3 options within a 30 minute radius.  One option was not going to work.  We had tried that option 2 summers ago and it was disastrous.  Emma was at a nationally-known daycare chain and I was not pleased with the service provided.  And I did let them know.  Anyway, the other two options were about 8 miles down the road and 12 miles down the road.  I called both places and was able to get into both the next day for meet and greets.  I would be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed.  The two directors were super sweet and very engaging with Emma.  However, the location wasn’t warm.  The setting wasn’t “homey”.  More sterile and sparse.  And not even that clean.  More than that, I had the feeling that these were facilities for kids with severe delays.  Many of them non-verbal.  A few in wheelchairs.  All of them much older.  The ratio was great, though…someone to work with Emma much of the time.  Better than a 1:4, probably.  But it wasn’t good enough.  I was frustrated…I thought that one of these places would be a great fit for Emma.  But Emma is where she is…she’s verbal.  She can express wants and needs.  She is like a little sponge.  And I want her to be challenged.  I want her to have age-appropriate behaviors modeled.  It made me sad…why aren’t there more options for her?Why was I doing everything I could for her and it still wasn’t enough?? I was nervous for the summer.  I don’t want her to lose anything she has learned this year.  I know, it’s not realistic.  But it’s what I want.  She’s going to need guidance and reinforcement.  And, as all this was going through my mind cooking dinner (and, yes, drinking a glass of red wine), I got a phone call from one of our babysitters (who’s more like a family friend family) that she had quit her job and would be widely available to help us out this summer.  It wasn’t a HUGE sigh of relief, but I felt better.  And the more I sit and think about it, the better I feel.  I will still do playdates, we will still get together with friends (Beth, I’m coming over!), she will still get that social modeling and interaction.  And she will get the love and support from our sitter who will come a few times a week to help her.  And that’s all I could ask for!

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